Decisions

So do you ever wonder if you made the right decision? In certain situations, you can make a decision that really doesn't matter at the time, but in the long run, it does make a difference. What if you bought the black top instead of the pink one? I know that that analogy might be silly to some, but when you really think about it, each decision you make changes your life.
Here recently I have been contemplating some of the decisions that I have made recently in my life. I guess in all reality, the decisions that I have made haven't ruined my life, but I wonder what I would have done if I had done things differently. Where would I be right now? What would I be doing? How would I feel about what I am doing? Was it the right decision? Was I being selfish when I made the decision? I don't know if its me or if its something else because I tend to be swayed when I am in the presence of (either reading online or actually in person) of someone who has made a different choice than I did.
Why can't someone just tell me what to do? Why do I feel the need to second guess myself? I am a good mom. I do the right things for my kids. If I am such a good mom, then why do I worry about what I have done? My kids are healthy, smart, and oh so cute. When I second guess myself, I tend to put myself down for the decisions that I have made. Did I do it because it was what was best for me or for them? Am I just being selfish or did I have a legitimate reason for doing what I did.
I know that this whole post might be confusing to some people and some people who haven't gone through it wouldn't understand, but to me its important. I just hope that I am not on that slippery slope that can sometimes be considered as PPD. I get mad at myself for not breastfeeding longer than I did with the twins. Did I give up too early? Should I have stuck with it longer to give them more benefits? I mean they are healthy big boys, not lacking in the weight department. They seem to be developing right on track and to be so happy. Am I just worrying about it because I know people around me that are breastfeeding or is it because I am being selfish and wanting to do it too. lkajseo frawl,kenrf.paw2k/ I get so frustrated when I second guess myself on the things that I do in my kids lives. I guess all I can do is pray. Pray that I can be at peace with my decisions and to move on with life and do things that I enjoy.