Ups and Downs

So we had a blast at Marc's company Christmas party last night. We got all dressed up and went to The Top Of The Met. It was gorgeous! We had a good time with some of the people there as well. One of the guys that Marc works with, his wife works here at the hospital with me so it was nice to know someone there. We also stayed at the Hilton Hotel which was only about a block from the party. It was nice to get away from the kids and relax. I just wish that I had slept better than I did! I guess that I was worried I wasn't going to wake up in time for work, even though I had my alarm set.

Here we are in front of the 100 ft Christmas Tree in the Met!

Now onto the down part of this post. I love my kids more than life itself. It sucks when I can't be there for them when exciting things happen. Today was Joey's first Christmas party at church. They had games, face painting, and they got to take home some toys! And I missed it. I had to work. It really hits me when I miss something in my kids' lives because I have to work. It's not even like I want to work anymore, I HAVE to. UGH! I can't deal with missing whole days of my kids' lives. I get them out of bed (most mornings) and put them directly in the car. Drive an hour and 15 minutes and drop them off at the sitters house. Then I head to work. By the time I see them again, they are already asleep for the night (in the car.) I might get to see them if they wake up once we get home, but its not a guarantee. Whole days I miss. It's hard to see that I actually work for a reason. I essentially work to pay for my car and that's about it. Ugh! Help me realize it will be ok!